Older players
Posted: Mon Jul 06, 2020 1:27 am
I was at spawn last night and I saw a couple of players that I had not seen in ages. We all started talking about past players and past clans. Some of those players and clans that we talked about I had not heard or thought about in a very long time.
It made me realize that I had been playing FT since 2013 and that so much of my life and memories revolved around FT or rather FT revolved around so much of my life and memories. It made me think about the past and I started to feel very sad. I started to feel very sad thinking about the the past and the good memories in my life and thinking about all of the people that I have lost along the way. I started to think about all of the players that I have known that have been lost along the way.
I started to think about all of the older players that have left FT and it made me very sad. I thought about it for a very long time. At around 10 pm I heard fireworks outside and I remembered that the fireworks were going on at the stadium less than 2 miles from my house so I stepped outside to watch the fireworks. I also remembered that my wife and I split up exactly 1 year ago on the 4th of july.
As I watched the fireworks in my yard next to a big cornfield, I was overcome with a powerful sadness. Sadness that my wife and our 3 dogs and 2 cats were gone(whom I love and miss so much that it hurts everyday), sadness that so many of my friends that I've known in FT have all left the game, sadness that the future is uncertain, both in FT and in my life. I looked up at the sky, and there was a full moon that lit up the field next to my house and there were lightning bugs that were lighting up like crazy like a million tiny lights and there was a fog that hung in the air just above the corn and the ground and It was an overwhelming and surreal scene.
I realized that I have lost so many people along the way on my journey. I realized that life is full of pain. I realized that I have lost my damn mind. How in the world have I made it this far in life. When will it be my turn to leave FT forever like so many other players that I have known over the years? When will it be my turn to become a ghost?
It made me realize that I had been playing FT since 2013 and that so much of my life and memories revolved around FT or rather FT revolved around so much of my life and memories. It made me think about the past and I started to feel very sad. I started to feel very sad thinking about the the past and the good memories in my life and thinking about all of the people that I have lost along the way. I started to think about all of the players that I have known that have been lost along the way.
I started to think about all of the older players that have left FT and it made me very sad. I thought about it for a very long time. At around 10 pm I heard fireworks outside and I remembered that the fireworks were going on at the stadium less than 2 miles from my house so I stepped outside to watch the fireworks. I also remembered that my wife and I split up exactly 1 year ago on the 4th of july.
As I watched the fireworks in my yard next to a big cornfield, I was overcome with a powerful sadness. Sadness that my wife and our 3 dogs and 2 cats were gone(whom I love and miss so much that it hurts everyday), sadness that so many of my friends that I've known in FT have all left the game, sadness that the future is uncertain, both in FT and in my life. I looked up at the sky, and there was a full moon that lit up the field next to my house and there were lightning bugs that were lighting up like crazy like a million tiny lights and there was a fog that hung in the air just above the corn and the ground and It was an overwhelming and surreal scene.
I realized that I have lost so many people along the way on my journey. I realized that life is full of pain. I realized that I have lost my damn mind. How in the world have I made it this far in life. When will it be my turn to leave FT forever like so many other players that I have known over the years? When will it be my turn to become a ghost?
