Monster Puns

As the description says!

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Gullander
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Location: Gladsheim

Monster Puns

Post by Gullander » Thu Jul 02, 2020 6:14 pm

Here is an attempt to lighten the mood by a few monster related puns. Please feel free to add to the silliness! These are in no particular order so any monster works..whenever.

Why does a caveman watch what he eats?
He doesn’t want a cave-ity in his tooth

What is a caveman’s favorite subject in school?
Trog-onometry

What do you call an upset seaman?
An irate pirate

What USA states have the worse monster infestations?
Orc-kansas and Orc-lahoma

What do orcs like to hear to relax?
An orchestra!

What monsters besides ogres like fishing?
Trolls…they love trolling for fish.

Crazed lions are ornery they don’t take things lion down!

What did the player exclaim about how dangerous crazed lions are?
If I’m lion I’m dyin!

Who would have thought crazed lions would be control freaks?
They like things lioned up properly!

What is a gnome’s favorite FT ore?
Platignome

Why do gnomes have the most awesome words?
They are great at gnomenclature!

What Beach boy song can be heard sung around the palace in the desert?
Barbarann…bar bar bar barbar barann…

What do you call a very friendly and talkative ogre?
Suspicious! No the real answer is ogregarious!

What is an ogre who is always pleasant?
That is a rarity…real answer ogreeable!

What part of a day does a dragon hate the most?
Morning when he is dragon himself out of bed!

What is a southern mushyman’s favorite breakfast?
Sweetened corn Mush

What is a mushyman’s favorite sci-fi theme?
Mushtian invasions!

What happens when a ghost becomes confused?
He is flabberghosted!

What happens to a lazy ghost?
He gets overweight becoming flabberghosted!

Why are demons teachers?
They are good at demonstrating things

What happens when you encounter demons?
It is a dangerous devilopement!

What do you call a monster sporting an animal skin cap?
A dapper trapper!

What was all the rage among trappers in the 1920’s?
Trapper flappers!

How did the New York vampire get confused looking at a tall building?
He thought it was the vampire state building!

What proof do vampire hunters look for?
Vampirical evidence!

What monsters love Shakespeare?
A blitzbee and lightning bee..two bee or not too bee!

What cloth do flying reptiles really like?
Pterycloth!

What did the player say the first time he saw a ptery?
I am pteryfied!

What monster likes small things?
The minotaur loves minoatures

What is one good quality of those monsters wrapped in bandages?
They love their mummies!

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
"Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly!" G K Chesterton
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SellSword
Posts: 3046
Joined: Tue Aug 29, 2017 11:16 pm
Location: Ardesia

Re: Monster Puns

Post by SellSword » Thu Jul 02, 2020 8:22 pm

That's bad! :lol: I do approve, but it's been shown before that I have questionable taste with FT puns... ;)
Warriors are not the ones who always win, but the ones that always fight.
Blackbetty
Posts: 168
Joined: Sat Apr 28, 2018 12:41 am

Re: Monster Puns

Post by Blackbetty » Thu Jul 02, 2020 8:25 pm

😂😂😂

I hear orcegon is badly infested also
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Leone
Posts: 3662
Joined: Wed Aug 28, 2013 12:00 am
Location: Ashdown Village

Re: Monster Puns

Post by Leone » Thu Jul 02, 2020 9:32 pm

Nice!

Here is my favourite rubbish joke...

Two goldfish in a tank. One says to the other "who's driving this thing?"

I'll accept the forum ban.
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